Question by Janna: Can you come up with a funny story using these phrases?
Can you come up with a funny story using these phrases?

Like a blowed up duck
Can’t stop trembling, I got problems!
Ain’t nothing new about that
I wouldn’t touch that with a ten foot pole
They say it’s healthy to sweat
His eyes balls was stickin’ out of their sockets!

Best answer:

Answer by Sunshine♥ MattBaby
Dodge City, Kansas
Circa 1873

“Festus and The Duck”

Festus: “Doc…I’m a’ tellin’ ya. I **Can’t stop trembling, I got problems!** If I’m lying I’m dying!! It looked **Like a blowed up duck** !!! Why, that varmit was the strangest thang I’ve ever saw!”
Doc:” Uh huh……. You say it was three feet tall and weighed about 50 pounds?”
Festus:”Pretty nears.What do ya think it was?!”
Doc:” The imaginings of an idiot!! That’s what it was!” He rubbed his face,shook his head, and stared.”
Festus:”There you go!! You’re so nasty. **Ain’t nothing new about that.** Just as nasty as a prostitute standin’ on the corner on a rainy night.
Doc: ” **I wouldn’t touch that with a ten foot pole.** Goodnight you numbskull.”
Festus walked away, mumbling and grumbling…… **They say it’s healthy to sweat** but I think I’m getting plum sick over this thang.” He turned and yelled at Doc…… ” And **His eyes balls was stickin’ out of their sockets!** SO THERE, ya old scutter!!”

If you are a fan of “Gunsmoke,” you’ll enjoy this, I think.
This is the way Doc anf Festus spoke to each other. Their’s was a unique relationship. hahaha

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!